Fortress of Solitude

This past fall turned into one of the weirdest and most disappointing season I have had as a coach. It had nothing to do with the players, early morning practices, game day's, or bus rides. It had to do with my relationships with parents and the impact the last four years have had on me personally.

My relationship with parents has been evolving since I became a coach. "Parents" are probably the most difficult part of coaching. You can't make everyone happy a 100% of the time. Which is a hard concept for coaches to understand and accept.

Over the last couple of years I have tried to be more transparent and vulnerable with parents. I felt that being transparent and vulnerable would help parents understand the demands that come with coaching and why we do what we do. There are never any easy decisions that are made but we make decisions based on what is best for the program. Being vulnerable opens you up to complaints, criticism, and personal attacks. I, like most coaches, can deal with the complaints and criticism. We know it's part of the job and honestly we may be more critical of ourselves than parents could ever be. He have our our standards and expectations.

But vulnerability leads to personal attacks. That led to me not being as transparent as I wanted to be this year. I want to get something across. MY decisions are not based on parents personal attacks against me. MY decisions are based on what is best for the team and the personnel we have on the team. We had a special group of kids this year that allowed me to think outside the box and try systems you don't usually see at the high school level. Because of the decisions I made and my vulnerability the last couple of years I was very closed off this year. I was closed off to parents and players. I created my own Fortress of Solitude and ultimately led to being one of the factors that led me to leave my last job. As I mentioned before I can handle a lot of comments but there is a level that can't be crossed by parents and it happened this year.